There’s an epidemic going on amongst men. It’s a sickness, a deterioration of our masculinity, a destruction of our drive. The Emasculation of Men is real. It’s causes are debated, as are it’s characteristics. To avoid going down this road in our own lives, we need to recognize it in ourselves, in those around us, and have the courage to put a stop to it.
As we look back at our end of days, we’re going to see forks in the road. Sometimes we take the right path, partially because it’s easily recognized, other times we may take the wrong one, possibly because it’s the easier, lazier route. Today we’ll look at the causes of this mass emasculation, in order to find its cure.
A while back I went through a physical transformation. For me, that transformation was simply the alignment of my spirit – who I was internally – to my physical appearance. I felt awesome, ambitious, and strong internally, but scrawny and weak aesthetically. Packing on 40 pounds of muscle to my scrawny frame helped bridge that gap.
After that transformation I started this site to help guys bring their own gaps. To be Legendary. To be awesome. To sift through the slough of bullshit advice, and get to what works. As I’ve been blessed to help more and more accomplish this physical transformation, I’ve seen it’s true benefit.. As we grow stronger physically, we walk a little taller, with our head’s held higher. We give in to our ambitions, find focus and drive, and find more courage to face our fears. This physical transformation isn’t the final step; rather, it’s the spark that ignites a greater evolution towards becoming a better man. It’s the first domino we knock down on our way to becoming a better man in every sense.
If you want to start this domino effect in your own life…
Just as my physical transformation helped me stand taller, to act on my ambition, and to face my fears, my first real relationship showed me that I needed to be more assertive – and so my evolution continued…
I learned that I needed to take charge, even in areas I didn’t care all that much about – like choosing where we ate, or what wine we drank; the little things. Where I once confused masculinity with mere chivalry, I saw it in a deeper sense, and from the perspective of a woman.
With that relationship in my rearview long ago, my evolution still continues. Through reading and study, through starting my own business and growing it daily, through facing fears and pushing myself in new ways, I’ve grown more assertive, and in to a much stronger man – and I don’t mean physically. But my evolution is still in its infancy. Now, as I look back, had I not created that physical transformation, or gone through that first, eye-opening relationship, or started my own business and taken that risk, I may be on the wrong end of this article.
I’m lucky enough to have parents who raised me right, to be strong, to face my fears, and to have grit. I’m fortunate enough to have people in my life that steered me in the right direction, and to have deciphered the right path from the wrong one on my own, then have the courage to take that right path even though it may have been the harder, less popular road to take (most of the time). I can see in my own life the influences that could have led to my emasculation, and the ones that launched me in the opposite direction.
The Emasculation of Men
In every conversation I’ve had with women about what they want in a man, they always mention assertiveness. They want a man to take charge. They rarely say it, but they also want a man they can be proud of, one they can brag about to their lady friends. They want a man they feel safe with, and a man they admire. The common complaint amongst women is that this man is fleeting, non-existant, and a relic of the past.
Figuring out what women want in a man isn’t necessarily identifying what it means to be a man, but it helps; for the opposite of the masculine is the feminine. Like the yin and the yang, both forces need the other to coexist. What women of today long for, is a true masculine essence, an essence that is disappearing and unclear. It’s lines are being blurred. It’s disappearance, leaving women to have to pick up some of the slack and to fill the gap in their relationships.
When we think about the masculine, or the alpha male, we think about the lion, the leader of the pride. The essence of a man, a real man, however, goes much deeper than mere social alpha-ism. The masculine essence is ambition, assertiveness, action, strength, and fortitude. It’s logical. The emotional nature of the feminine craves this. We’re different, which is why we confuse one another so damn much, but we’re opposing forces in a magnetic sense – we attract one another as such – which is exactly why we can learn a lot about what it means to be a man from looking at it as the opposing force to the feminine essence.
This masculine essence is in decline. Men of today are much less assertive, and far less ambitious than they once were. We’re lazier. Weaker. We see this weakness in the mass exodus of men leaving their families, bucking their responsibilities, and opting for the easier, more selfish route. We see it in middle-aged men whose realities are so intertwined with their online personality, that they have no life outside of the internet. They are their persona in War Craft or Call of Duty. Their actions are in a make believe world, leaving their activity in the real world almost non-existant.