Man Up Monday: Know Your Power

Most of us live our lives as if our fate, our destiny, the journey our lives take, are the result of circumstance. The reality is that it is we who control our own fate, and we who decide our reactions to our circumstances. You can’t control everything, but you have the power to go with everything, to react to it effectively and in a manner that will lead you down a grand, epic path and journey.

Know your power. Know the power you have over your life and don’t give it up.

The warrior sees everything as a challenge. Most see everything as a blessing or a curse. Nothing is a curse. It’s impossible to see it as such if you’re a warrior, leading a warrior’s life.

A warrior can’t have excuses because excuses give us an out. They allow us to take it easy, “to take plays off”, days off.

Rid your life of excuses if you want to live the life you’re capable of living. (Read this: The Tale of the Warrior and The Coward)

Happy people have decided to live life on their terms. They have made a choice to be happy, to smile, to see the good even in the bad.

In Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl is puzzled by the difference between the men who lose their minds in the Concentration Camps of the Second World War, and those who are somehow able to survive and even find joy in such horrors.

The is no physical difference, no difference in the treatment of the men. The only difference is that one group has chosen to find meaning within their suffering, and if a man can squeeze out any semblance of meaning from a Concentration Camp, we have no reason nor excuse not to do the same in our daily struggles and trials.

Find the meaning, it’s there. It’s your choice to find it and create it.

It’s a simple question that very few of us ever ask: Is what I’m doing right now essential to my success, or can I do without it?

Much of what we do actually pulls us away from where we want to be and what we should be focusing on.

When you plan your week, ask yourself if “x” should be on the list of things to do, or is it something that can wait, replacing it with something that IS essential to your success.

Spend time on the stuff that matters most. If you’re not doing that now you’re spending time on stuff that pulls you away from where you want to be. (Read this: Why You Need to Be An Essentialist)

It’s easier to blame something else for our lack of success, which is why so many people live like this, thinking that they power over their life isn’t in their hands.

In every case, on every income level, poverty level geographic location, there is a success story, there is PROOF that no matter where you are, you can rise above…

… And even if there wasn’t, the man who’s going to live a grand life would set out to CREATE said proof.

Who controls your fate?

Gratitude takes effort. When I don’t do this daily exercise I find myself dwelling on the things that aren’t great in my life, and even that’s a choice and a matter of perception.

Take the time and make the effort to be thankful for something, your health, fresh air, life, the laugh you had with a pal last night, the smile that a babe sent your way on the street yesterday. Who knows.

It’s important to identify these things daily, and they always exist.

Work smarter, not just harder. But the work still needs to be done.

One thing I’ve added to my day is thinking time. That is, rather than simply working on whatever for the sake of working on whatever, I sit and think about what the best thing I can be working on is.

The problem for many lies is working on useless stuff, but for others it’s found in thinking too much and never working at all.

Think, spend lots of time thinking, but don’t think so much that you never act.

Plans are useless. Actions are all that matter in life. (Read this: Time is Limited. Take Action)

Clarity is a simple solution to a lack of focus and direction. Clarity, however, takes time and introspection.

You won’t find clarity amidst the rat race, you need to break from from the routine, get out in nature, do some soul-searching, and create your way – don’t FIND IT.

Take a day every month to figure out where you want to be and if you’re on the right path. AT LEAST a day every month. It’s tough to get out of those things we think are important, the tasks and to do’s, but it’s vital to both your health and your degree of happiness in life to figure this stuff out.

The fallacy of happiness is that people identify it incorrectly. They get lost in the myth of ease, that happiness isn’t working, then when they feel as though they have no value, no purpose, they get depressed and have lost the ability to hustle and create value and purpose.

Have a mission, a vision, a goal.

When you have something to work towards, the journey, not the destination, will be that thing that brings happiness and meaning into your life.

Hustle not to earn money, thinking that money will bring you meaning or value, hustle for the pure enjoyment of the struggle. It’s within this struggle where you’ll find meaning and purpose and a happiness that can’t be shaken by loss or failure, it’s indestructible.

Very few ever really give it their all. Of those that do, many make it in the field they’re pursuing and striving toward. Not all though.

However, each of these humans who give everything in the pursuit of a goal, a dream, will become better for it and likely end up creating something far better than they ever thought possible.

Every human on this earth should know what it’s like to TRULY sacrifice to reach a goal. They should feel the sting of defeat and the elation of victory. That should know what it’s like to put everything into a project, a goal, a dream, yet feel the uncertainty that comes with having nothing to fall back on.

You should, by all means, put all of your eggs in one basket. If you fail, it will sting, but the man you become will be able to withstand anything.

We like to make excuses for other people. We like to have reasons as to why they’re fat or weak or broke. We blame society and societal structures. We blame history and capitalism and socialism.

We blame the system. What we don’t blame is the individual.

People don’t need your pandering. They don’t need another excuse to fail, they need a reason to win.

People don’t need you to feel sorry for them, they don’t need your pity, they need your faith.

When you give people an excuse, a way out, some underlying reason or construct as to why things are the way they are, the majority will take it and use it to fail.  (Read this: 10 Steps to Becoming a Loser)

The problem is in the logic. Within each class or body type or birthplace, there are success stories. There is proof. When you do what they did to succeed, you open doors for yourself. When you listen to the people that want to feel sorry for you, you give yourself a way out, devoid of work and sacrifice and persistence, where mediocrity and failure are sure to be your companions.

There is no value in daring to do only what you know you can do. There’s no growth in spending your life in the known, the value is in the unknown, beyond your zones of comfort and even beyond your current grasp.

Dare Mightier. It will require you to work harder, be smarter, and live larger.

More Man Up Monday’s: If You Half Ass Your Work You Will Half Assed Your Life